Jan. 16, 2011

"And all the roads we have to walk are winding."- Cartel

Everyone keeps letting me down. At least it seems that way. For once I wish someone would do what they say they are going to do, or at least do what they are supposed to do... is that too much to ask? Apparently so. They say the only man a girl can rely on is her daddy. But what do you do when you can't even rely on him? What if the person who is supposed to adore you and give you all your basic needs (food, clothing, college, etc.) acts just as childish as your seven-year-old sister?

People these days are just so backwards. It's hard for me to comprehend the thought process of some people. I know I am no where near perfect, but I like to think I keep other people's feelings in mind and I try my best not to hurt them or leave anyone out. It is very hard for me to fathom being completely and utterly selfish, it's especially difficult for me to think of a father treating his daughter that way.

I just have this overwhelming feeling of needing to start over lately. It seems like that's what I have been doing my whole life. Every few years moving hours and hours away and having to start over. New house, new school, new friends, new life. College will be a new experience (if I ever make it there). I want to make sure I get my life on the right track. I don't want to be forty years old and unhappy, feeling like I have never done anything for myself. I want every year to be the new best year of my life.

Wish List:
1. Happiness
2. Someone I can always rely on
3. Someone to tell me I'm beautiful, when I look a hot mess
4. Someone to tell me I'm amazing, when I need it most

5. Someone to just listen